Review-lite
…because…
We’ve noticed a trend in romances that disturbs us.
One of the characters behaves in ways that border (or even cross over into) abusiveness. In lesfic, this is mostly emotional and/or verbal abuse. (Ghosting comes under emotional and/or psychological abuse.) The abusive behaviour is justified by portraying the person as an Ice Queen or attributing their behaviour to past baggage. This person is pretty normal in all their relationships – except with the romantic interest.
Usually the other lead is a beautiful person. Open, loving, giving, accepting, mature, honest, sexy. They overcome their own issues, make themselves vulnerable and go out on the limb for love.
The disturbing part in the dynamic of these two typical MCs is that the one behaving like an asshole seldom ever takes corrective actions or apologises. The person who is loving and know how to love, care and be in a relationship bends over backwards to have a relationship at all. She becomes all about appeasement and takes on the full emotional burden of the relationship.
When this is how a relationship starts it sets the template for the interaction between the couple for the future. And this kind of template for the future marks an awful partnership.
We find this particularly disturbing because frequent use of this kind of dynamic by multiple authors normalizes this behaviour. It sends subtle messaging and makes emotional, verbal and psychological abuse acceptable. Worse, it makes people believe that if they do not accept such behaviour and make good with the abuser, they fail.
We sincerely hope that authors desist from writing MCs behaving like assholes without facing serious repercussions for such behaviour. Yes, they do deserve a second chance, but only if they realise that their behaviour is unforgivable, they correct and change their behaviour and most importantly, they apologise and make good with the other leading lady.
